Friday, December 12, 2008

Dear Landon. Month One.

(originally posted November 17, 2008)

Dear Landon.

About this time one month ago, you were about to introduce yourself to everyone. Surrounded by people I love, and people that love me, we were talking and laughing and ... waiting. Waiting on You. It wasn't time yet for sure - but - you had your own agenda. Your own plans. And you had someone Higher Up in charge of things. Tired of waiting on your Mama to figure out that - hello - SHE is not in charge.

And so. We waited. All of us. Nervous. Excited. In love already. Who knew someone so small could cause such a commotion?


Finally. The Grandson. Someone to take hunting and fishing and golfing. Someone who shouldn't require a million pairs of shoes and Barbies. Should be fun. Everytime I make it to the toy section of the store with the girls, I find myself fascinated by Boy Toys. Legos. Dinosaurs. Plastic Trucks. Hmm... are you too young for the giant chemistry set? Sarah Beth is personally hoping that your birth means a future investment in an ATV... for you, of course. Naturally.


Eleven days in the NICU to learn to breathe. And eat. And then, after we'd accomplished all that, we had to combine the two... eat and breathe all at the same time. Amazing things ... miracles happen in that place - and I am grateful for every second we could spend there. We were the lucky ones, you and I. Even though I cried every night because - well, I missed you. After a week of frustrating steps forward and back - the nurses would say - don't worry. Don't worry. I am still trying to remember that. Everyday, I remind myself. Don't. Worry.

I managed to get us both ready for church on Sunday - and actually there on time. This whole baby thing? Yeah. I am sorta out of practice. Sometimes I am late feeding you. Sometimes you have a wet diaper. But so far, you're handling my lack of recent experience like a champ. You and I? We're making Flying By The Seat of Our Pants a whole new fashion.


You started out tiny. Tiny toes, tiny hands. But, you are growing. Still not quite filling out your "newborn" size... but everyday, we see something new about you we didn't notice before. My fingers. And Jordin confesses, you have her nose. Which makes it my nose, right?


If I could sum up your first four weeks of life... it would be with one word... Love. You have been smothered with kisses, hugs and head rubs. Jordin's favorite spot to nap is where ever you are. Sarah Beth wakes up early just to hold you. And me? Well. Don't tell anyone. But you are so toootallly sleeping in the same bed with me. That's a secret.

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